35

February 25, 2023

Today is my 35th birthday. Happy Birthday to me!! My first thought is how?! This last year has flown by but I feel like I turned 34 three years ago. šŸ˜‚If you ask me how I feel, physically I would say 28. I’m not in the best shape of my life (that would probably have been a couple of summers ago when I was working out all the time). Lately, I have been intentional with working out and drinking water. More than anything though I feel blessed.

Typically when my birthday comes around, I start to mentally prepare myself for what age I’m going to be in December or January so it’s not shocking. The last couple of months has been busy with sickness in December as well as planning a trip to Disneyland. When I started really thinking about my birthday coming up a couple of weeks ago, the number surprised me.

I do not believe that I am old, and I am a tad annoyed when I hear people my age say that they are getting old. In my opinion, age is relative. There is always someone that is younger than you and someone who if they heard your age would recall that time in their life as being ā€œyoungā€. I may seem young to someone that is 45 or 50, the same way I would think that someone who is 20 or 25 is young. My dad is in his 80s and always comments that ā€œhe’s getting young nowā€ and I love that attitude. On the off moments that my Dad has mentioned being old, I will tell my Dad that there is somebody that is 100 dreaming of the good old days in their 80s.

I did have a moment the other day where I briefly thought ā€œI’m getting oldā€ when I was listening to the song 100 Years by Five for Fighting. When that song came out I was 15 years old. If you are familiar with that song, you know it’s about the different seasons of life starting at age 15 and also mentioning their life at age 22, 33, 45, 67, and 99. Then I thought wait that song is getting old. I’m still young. šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚

I am a little sad to reach the halfway point of my 30s. Just a pinch of sadness. So far in my life, I have had the best time in my 30s, more than any decade I’ve experienced so far. I feel confident in who I am, I like myself, I have been thoroughly blessed by my family and friends, had some awesome life experiences, and feel grounded in my faith.

It hasn’t all been sunshine and rainbows though. In my thirties, I have asked myself some hard questions, Am I happy with who I am? Does what I’m doing make a difference? Am I worthy? Am I investing my time into things that have value? Am I in a situation because I want to be here or because I feel obligated to be? Am I living out my purpose? I’ve re-related to my faith in Jesus. Ā I’ve had tough times in my parenting journey. In my thirties, I’ve gone through periods of sadness, depression, anxiety, and loneliness. I am grateful for those challenging times, hardships, and questions as I have overcome them.

If 20-year-old me could see what 35-year-old me has done, she would be proud. Even little girl Jasmine would be in awe of the wife, mom, and friend that we grew up to be.

My 34th year was a mix of some hard questions but mostly good things. I had some great times building new relationships, deepening others, and trying new things. I traveled a lot. Said goodbye to some experiences and situations but hello to new ones.

This year I am hoping to be settled and organized. Things can get so crazy in my life with our family and activities that our house can be a catch-all and I feel like I am shuffling around the same old papers instead of cleaning off the counter – although maybe that’s part of it. My kids are getting older and I’m asking myself what’s next. I don’t have the answer yet but I’m seeking God and content with where I am right now.

But more than anything I am grateful to God for bringing me to this point in my life. I don’t take it lightly that I’ve been blessed with these days, years, love, family, and life. Here’s to more of my future’s good ol’ days.