Washing dirty dishes are one of my least favorite chores. I hate them. A fellow blogger friend of mine asked her followers recently, “If you could have instant laundry done or instant dishes done what would you choose?” For me, it is dishes. Something about them all just sitting in the sink irritates me. Unlike laundry where you can distract yourself from folding clothes by watching tv, with dishes you just have to stand there and do it. That’s all you can do. Maybe in some households, you can listen to music or a podcast but my house is too loud for that. I don’t even wash my dishes by hand but the work in rinsing off all the dishes on the trip to the dishwasher or scrubbing our cooking pots and pans is more than enough.
We are friends with the previous owners of our home and one of the things my friend said she didn’t like about the house was the visibility of the number of dishes in the sink. Thankfully my husband moved our pantry to block the view from the front door and also installed a deeper sink so it can pile up a little higher while remaining out of view. 🙌🏾 But I digress. Even without it being hidden I have a disdain for dishes.
That being said, doing dishes are often when I pray and get new ideas for things. I have had many an ‘ah-ha’ moment at the sink. Some may call it coincidence but I know who is responsible for all of “my” inspiration. It’s the Lord. Let me give you a few examples.
About two months ago, I was presented with a leadership opportunity amongst a group of women – particularly mothers – and I wanted to do it bad. I mean BAD. I have a big heart for my fellow woman, especially a fellow mom and want to help encourage her in any way that I can. This was that kind of opportunity. My husband and I were talking about it and as much as I wanted to do it, it wasn’t sitting right with me. One of the many lessons that I learned during quarantine is the importance of being there for your family. As much as you can “be there” supporting the outside world, the heart of life is what is going on inside your home.
When my husband and I discussed what responsibilities came with facilitating the role, he suggested I pursue it. In my marriage, I don’t want to move forward with larger time taxing decisions. I want my husband onboard. Even if he’s not physically involved with the decision, the strain on my time affects him and our family. Anyway, he supported me.
The next day I was washing a sink full of dirty dishes from the night before. That is my least favorite thing to do in the morning. Dirty dishes are a buzz kill. I began dreaming up all of these awesome leadership ideas on how I could encourage these moms. I was excited! Then I had a thought pop in my mind outta nowhere. “What if the excitement you had about working in this group you had about your own marriage?”. 😬😮 My husband often gets the short end of the stick. Like A LOT! He is the most supportive person but one of his primary love languages is quality time. I have been guilty of putting so many outside responsibilities ahead of him and our relationship (not to mention the three humans in our house that call me Mommy).
I felt convicted but also excited. What if I was more excited about my own relationship? That group had no shortage of leaders but my husband only has one wife. That was two months ago and I’m happy to report that I am more focused on my marriage than ever. I’m invested. Not that I ever wanted to leave (I never have) but I’m more focused on what is the vision of that relationship. How is our foundation? Am I being intentional to think about, connect, and spend time with him throughout the day? What does our future look like? These are the types of questions I ask myself that I wasn’t cognizant of before washing those dishes.
And wouldn’t you know it that God brought up another opportunity to help out some fellow mamas? This time virtually! WWAAAAYYYYY less of a time commitment than what I was thinking where I get to facilitate some Bible studies through YouVersion. 🙌🏾 I didn’t have to seek it out, the opportunity was brought to me. He knew how much I wanted to help out a group of moms and he was faithful to honor that even when I didn’t ask him. He’s so good! Not only faithful to give me the desire of my heart but he met me right where I was. In the mundane, he spoke right to my heart. I used to think that God would only speak after being facedown on my floor after reading a whole book of the Bible and praying for an extended amount of time. He does do that. But he can also speak over a sink full of dishes. ❤️