My husband and I went on our last vacation together three years ago. A vacation meaning time away from home for just the two of us without our children. 🙌🏾 Not to be confused with a family trip where you do bring your kids. Two years ago, we had a staycation before our youngest child was born but my husband was doing some work on our house and I was as big as a house 😅 so it wasn’t exactly relaxing. More than anything after almost non-stop parenting throughout the pandemic, we needed this time alone and away together.
We chose to go to Tulsa which isn’t too far away from our home base to celebrate our 13th wedding anniversary. We went to the same casino resort that we did for our 10 year anniversary and it did not disappoint. They have a great pool complete with fake palm trees and a swim-up bar. The perfect place to relax and do absolutely nothing. As we got closer to leaving for our vacation, I started to get nervous. How would the kids do while we were away? Would my husband and I even have fun? Although I was a stay-at-home parent before the pandemic, I found that spending an overwhelming amount of time with my kids while strengthening our bond, also formed a somewhat unhealthy attachment to them. I started to feel anxious when I would take time away from them on the few dates that my husband and I would go on. And even though I decided to spend time focusing more on the relationship with my husband last year, there is something to be said for time alone with your spouse outside your home.
As convinced as I was about spending one on one time with your spouse, and the blog posts I have written in years past, our time away solidified it for me. Getting to sit poolside with my husband, laugh, joke, people watch and dream helped to cement all the love that I have for him in the present moment. We held hands when we walked. We had uninterrupted conversations. We enjoyed each other’s company. We had fun!
I was beginning to feel a sense of dread that the best of years of my life (as a wife and mom to little kids) was passing me by. But as much as I love having young kiddos, there are things to look forward to in the future, such as the relationship with spouse among a laundry list of other things. I don’t want to look at my spouse like a stranger when we are empty nesters because we spent so much time focusing on our role as parents more than as a married couple.
I thoroughly enjoy my kids but my husband comes first. The one-on-one time with him was invaluable so here’s to more dates, time alone, and regular connection. ❤️